Monthly Archives: February 2010

Exploding Bananas


William Lamson via Boing Boing
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Getting Away With Murder

Observer – Getting away with murder? The death of Martine Vik Magnussen

“When a vivacious Norwegian woman was found raped and strangled in the basement of a London flat, suspicion fell on a fellow student. But two years on, the case remains unsolved. We reconstruct her last night from interviews and previously unseen pictures, and speak to her father about his campaign to find justice for Martine Vik Magnussen”
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Bobsled Woe


Bobsledding. I loves it. Watching four men whizz down icy half-tubes shouldn’t be so entertaining; alas the GB team lost it on a corner and ended up overturning :(

Corners eleven through thirteen on the Whistler Olympic track are dangerous, with the in-running speed high and corner thirteen sharp; the exit causes the sleds to lean dangerously to the right and so many sleds end up tipping into the wall and then overturning.

It’s always a big crash and if they do manage to keep upright at the very least their team get a hell of a hit on their helmets. Scary. It’s always rather worrying to see the sled speeding down the track belly up and then you have to wait as the rescue teams use hooks to pull the sled upright to see if all the occupants are in one piece.

Bobsledders embody my ideal man pretty much- well-built, powerful, broad-chested and shouldered with perhaps a little extra padding for insulation. Not ripped or terribly defined, just sort of capable looking. Sturdy. Oh and they wear skin-tight Lycra :D
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Terry Richardson and manwich

“Me and 9 feet of Manwich!”

NSFW Terry Richardson’s Diary
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Stella Tilda Playing

Tilda Stella McCartney’s Tilda Playing set – FLOCKING, animal print and mesh! CUTE! CUTE! CUTE!

From NSFW Coco de Mer

Also, Lascivious at Figleaves

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Dear Zachary

I have just finished watching the most upsetting documentary I think I have ever seen and I am an emotional wreck. Nay, it’s the most upsetting film I have ever seen:

Dear Zachary: A Letter to a Son About His Father

It is a horrifying tale which I can’t really sum up particularly well here (go to the Wikipedia link); a man – Andrew Bagby – broke up with a sociopathic woman who then shot and killed him, fled the country whilst pregnant with his child and was let out on bail before being given custody of said child when it was born, all whilst the slowly turning wheels of justice fucked things up repeatedly.

The grief, pain and anger contained within the film is deeply, deeply upsetting and what makes it worse is that these negative emotions are contrasted with the beautiful, all-encompassing love shown by those mourning Andrew’s death. It’s made by a childhood friend of the victim and oozes love, cataloguing memories of Andrew for his son Zachary.

I found it an extremely diffifult thing to watch but I would urge anyone to take the time to see it, to better understand love, pain, hate and justice. It’s available on the iPlayer this week.

Dear Zachary: Official Site
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Cheryl Cheryl (formerly) Kerl on Twitter

The Nation’s “Actual Bodily Harm but not racialist of course” Sweetheart.

Typical entries include:
“Aall these storees aboot wor Ash? Well it ill befits uz tuh commint. One prefaws tuh rees aburve meeah tittil-tattil man pet.”
“Ah someteimes think Ah should pack in mei music an gan an dee summat moa worthwhile. Leike mebbes woak in Human Resaosaz.”
“Mei produca seys Ah’m layin doon sum killah choons an veebs in the studieu. Man, burrAh havven a scooby doo wharreez on aboot”

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Why is Great Britain good at sliding at 90mph on a tea tray? WOO! Well done Amy Williams…

BBC Sport – Winter Olympics – Skeleton
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Liquid Love


Sizzle by Sean Rogers [cc]

I have discovered that hot showers are like liquid hugs. I go under the water and into arms that hold me feeling glum, angry, tired, sad and I feel better when I emerge.

With no-one to hug me, or for that matter for me to hug, my shower has become my micro-escape: Hey, a month in Hawai’i with the one I love would be preferable but it’ll have to do. I can go in, begin the particular order of washing myself and think about things whilst being calm and feeling comforted. At times I still feel a bit sad standing there soaping myself but that usually flows away down the drain; one of my favourite things in the whole wide world comes when I get out and dry off: To crawl naked and shower-clean under my duvet.

I love it- Feeling clean and warm and peaceful as I slide into my bed, the feeling of the fabric against my skin… i’m a sucker for textural pleasures… I curl up with Patrick and relax into my nest, feeling terribly content, at least for a little while, ’til my brain lands on the Usual Suspects that roam unrestrained about my head.

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Being a little more padded than when I last shopped for a well-fitting bra today to pass some time I tried out some push-up numbers. I used to be all against push-up bras feeling that they deceived a little too much and would lead viewers to believe that what was barely contained within was factual. Anyway, my thoughts have changed on the subject – i.e. fuck it – and so i’ve been trying a few out for size.

Getting the correct size is proving an issue as the ones i’ve tried so far don’t contain all the breast tissue in a way i’d expect- I want everything focused up and towards the front, not falling out of the sides. What the hell is going on there, I have no idea. Anyway, I need to try a fair few more until I let the look of the previous push-up…

Skyranger The only push-up I own is a rather beautiful piece by AP – Nikita in gorgeous green satin – however although this gives me actual cleavage it is now too small and there is no way I can afford anything AP that is not in the sale (where I got my Nikita). Whilst browsing their site I came across the following astounding item: Skyranger

Yes, it’s massively expensive for what it is but look! Look at the awesome! Bright colours… Fringing… Metallics… Goodness it is trashily lovely.

I shall not be purchasing either Nikita or Skyranger but will continue my quest for a decent bra. I figure I owe it to myself to try and present myself a little better? Not that i’m suddenly going to go blonde and simpering; I guess making the most of what i’ve got? Or at least a little more…?

I think I feel this way because i’m feeling undervalued again- because I am undervalued!

It’s sex on the brain, or more specifically having needs that aren’t satisfied and haven’t been so for months. I miss having an intimate partner and all that entails – well not *all* that – the snoring and duvet-thievery I certainly do not; at the same time as I miss it I know there’s nothing to be done about it- I’m not one for one-night-stands and i’m not confident enough to date.

So i’ll just take what solace I can find in my battery-powered friends and comfort in food. Take lots of long hot showers where I linger a little longer over washing the soap suds off. Look at unaffordable unobtainables and sigh a lot. SIGH.
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Made It

So I made it through to Monday. Hoorah. First day of a week off and i’ve been fairly productive, going through all the clothes that I no longer fit into and bagging them up ready to take to a charity shop, before making lemon muffins that actually worked (!) and ricotta gnocchi that really didn’t- Like eating large, warm, tremulous slugs. Mmm…

I did some handwashing and a little bush-whacking and pondered what to and how to eat cheaply for the rest of the week. I watched The September Issue and enjoyed it – bravo Grace Coddington – and also took in a few eps of Battlestar Galactica to round the day off.

Tomorrow I feel that a wander for fruit and vegetables is in order as I feel i’ve been missing the green stuff; i’m also craving a big hunk of meat, but that might have to wait until le weekend…

I must try and get some proper writing done here – if you can call anything I write on nopoke “proper” – there’s a lot to recap from the course of the last few weeks and I have a lot on my mind. Just for a change, like…
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VD Science


xkcd – From Dr. Petra
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McQueenAlexander McQueen, Autumn 2009 RTW

I just have to get through tomorrow before I get a week away from work… Tomorrow and then through Sunday, which will mark six months since I last saw MW#1 and, unfortunately, Valentines Day.

With all the thoughts and feelings flooding round my brain my head feels like it’s going to cave in on itself, cave in on me I suppose.

If I can get through to Sunday without popping like a submersible gone-too-deep all will be well i’m sure, but today after McQueen and the last couple of weeks i’ve had at work I feel deeply sad… I can’t really describe or elucidate the meaning; I need some emotional release but it’s proving hard to find it.

I need a hot shower with lots of hugging myself followed by bed, hugs with Patrick and sleeeep. I’m fed up of being so tired and sad… :(

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Alexander McQueen, dead at forty. Such a loss…

His work was theatrical but beautifully cut showing a clear understanding of a woman’s form and how best to accentuate or deceive as appropriate. I was driving home when I heard the news… So terribly sad… :(

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Elvis – Edge of Reality

Edge of Reality
Elvis Presley
From Live a Little, Love a Little

From Jones & X.Ray

Check out the visuals for this oddly appealing song. It is *mighty* awesome, especially with the coordinated dancing and pastel suit…

I’m not a particular fan of Elvis, however with regards this track I can understand the appeal; I think I prefer the Elvis of Edge of Reality, Suspicious Minds, Always On my Mind– Yes, sad ballads of loss. Go me.

Seriously odd fuller-length clip here (hello talking dog)

The song is good but the video is compelling due to the bright colours, repetition and mirroring of Elvis. In my Evil Masterplan File (i.e. my head!) I would like to re-enact this video with me in the slim-cut baby blue suit, with male dancers replacing the women, but perhaps it would still work with girls? I would have to work on my long stare… but i’d quite like to do that…

I think this idea is related to my Mr. Orange re-enactment, that thing I still want to do but will never get round to doing because I put too many barriers in the way… Sigh.

“Dark shadows follow me…”
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Dublin I spent this weekend in the “Fair City” of Dublin in honour of my Dad’s recent sixtieth birthday and his official retirement.

The place was much changed since my last visit – over ten years ago now – but the run-down feeling of the place had definitely not, European money or no.

It was grey and chilly and horribly expensive and so the money I was planning to save this month is gone. I had a good time eating good food and drinking good booze, although as is usual my Dad tried to take control of many things and was patronising and annoying. Ugh.

It was good to see my Mum and bro however and nice to take in a change of scene; I feel seriously wiped out by it all and am really looking forward to curling up in my own (rented) bed with Patrick.

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